i'm just one of the flowers

One day my friend next door in our sassoon road residence told me this story about Plato and his teacher...

One fine day Plato asked his teacher, "What is love?" and he was instructed to go into the forest and search for the most beautiful flower. The only condition was that he could only walk ahead without looking back. As Plato walked through the woods he saw many lovely and flowers. One after the other. But he was reluctant to pick any of them because he kept on hoping that the next one he saw would be even more beautiful. So he looked and walked on. Until it's the end of the forest and his teacher saw him without any flowers. He asked him why he didn't choose any. Plato answered, "I was always hoping for a more beautiful one after a beautiful flower."

And his teacher replied, "This is love."

* * *
Remember the story about Plato and his teacher that was told by my friend next door? I couldn't make much of a meaning out of it apart from a pessimistic one (as suggested by the title) until I got an inspiration from you today...

"I believe Plato had found the most beautiful one in the beginning. He didn't want to pick it up because its beauty could only be preserved at where it belongs. No matter how much he wanted to "possess" it, his love for the flower was far greater than his love for himself.

I'm sure he would have revisited the garden again."

So really, I don't have to be a flower at all. I can be Plato, if I try hard enough. Well, God make us wait patiently for He slowly reveals to us the beauty of the mystery... that can be a way of seeing it.

many, many years ago (more than 10?) someone wrote this poem for me, and i wrote a melody to go with it. ah, i liked the collaboration. whatever.

* * *

it was a dark seclusive night
under the sparkling stars with my lover in sight
for what great powers and might
can draw us close, this tight?

beauty, is the way that you sleep
with eyes slightly closed and a smile to keep
although uncertainty may be heap upon heap
my love for you is ever so deep

Leaving on a jet plane

All my bags are packed,
I'm ready to go
I'm standing here outside your door
I hate to wake you up to say goodbye
But the dawn is breaking,
It's early morn
The taxi's waiting,
He's blowing his horn
Already I'm so lonesome
I could cry.
So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go.
I'm leaving on a jet plane
I Don't know when I'll be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go.
There's so many times I've let you down
So many times I've played around
I tell you now, they don't mean a thing
Every place I go, I'll think of you
Every song I sing, I'll sing for you
When I come back, I'll wear your wedding ring.
So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go.
I'm leaving on a jet plane
I Don't know when I'll be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go.

Now the time has come to leave you
One more time
Let me kiss you
Then close your eyes,
I'll be on my way.
Dream about the days to come
When I won't have to leave alone
About the times, I won't have to say,
So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go.
I'm leaving on a jet plane
I Don't know when I'll be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go.

不要因為也許會改變，
　就不肯說那句美麗的誓言，
不要因為也許會分離，
　就不敢求一次傾心的相遇，
總有一些什麼，
　會留下來的吧，
留下來作一件不滅的印記，
　好讓，
好讓那些，
　不相識的人也能知道，
我曾經怎樣深深的愛過你。

Open your eyes just say goodbye
我這個夜晚應該哭個痛快
相遇不算太晚
相愛不算太短
現在正好適合離開
Open your eyes just say goodbye
只是不懂為什麼還笑得出來
承諾已經不再
嘆息無可計算
再不離開眼淚就要氾濫

每一種決定都像肝腸寸斷
每一種選擇都是心有不甘
過了今晚你要開始學著勇敢
不可知的未來
你要自己承擔

每一種決定都像肝腸寸斷
每一種選擇都是心有不甘
誠實並不代表容許背叛

這樣的愛
只是錯誤的示範

i've just started a new blog... perhaps the new design will give me fresh ideas!!

http://humblybe.wordpress.com

22-9-2002

Caught a glimpse of the cardiac monitor in the next cubicle. The strange pattern caught my eye first. Not only was the rate irregularly irregular, the amplitude too was going up and down like a frenzy rope swung by 2 people not looking at each other. The frenzied heart beat gasped for its own breath as if it's using full energy to run for the last train. And as the train fades out in its own pace, the heart finally has to slow down. 25 ... 20... 5... 0...

By then, the people surrounding the bed have dried their tears, but their swollen eyes reminded them that, it was real, it really happened.

The nurses started to pack things away, folding tubes and wirings, pushing away the disconnected cardiac monitor... I wondered if he was still there, since I once learned that, hearing, is one of the last senses to fade.

Right next to the cubicle, in the one where I was, nobody noticed the gloom of next door; the TV drama brought laughter to those watching it, doctors and nurses walking in and out, and I, who was caught at that moment in time, woke up again.

Life goes on...

On that day...
Gosamer floats weightlessly as you are
The sea stops raging and sprays stop itching your eyes
No more tears, no more yearns
For the very moment has arrived at last
Sweet music ringing in our ears
And we dance...No one will be watching us

The feeling is so intense and strong
A volcano that never ruptures again
A hot bath that never turns cold
There will be no black or white
Time or space
Needs or wants
Simply, the inner reality
That we have once felt, and once lost

So for now...
Bear with this moment
Throw away your desires
as if there is no such existence
Until that day...

When all brings to a standstill...
When we meet in heaven

2000

粗黑方框眼鏡

Nirvana on guitar. They've got moving songs. I'm not a rock person but it got me moving. I had somebody give me an unplugged Cd of theirs a few years back. It is good. Music got this weird but special spell on me. Spellbound- my grade 7 examiner wrote this word on my marksheet, a little hard to believe at first... But that's what I've been trying to do, placing spells on people with my musical mind. I was playing a spanish piece at home while they were out in the living room. Then mum said to me, 'It's a wonderful piece.' Funny. They never said much about my playing. I never think much about what others said. When I play, it's as if the piano has chosen me. It's that tingly feeling you got when there's nothing in your mind except vivid colours. Orange and blue and purple. Sparkly stars glowing from the velvety night. Like diamonds. Like somebody's smile that melts your heart. You don't see them but you can feel it real. Like chu chu's smile (!) Like love. Oh. that's it.